By Kelly Gallimore, ChFC®, CES®
As seasons change, so do family dynamics. Although we aim to embrace each new season of life, few changes are as emotionally charged as shifting holiday expectations. These shifts, and attempting to ignore them, can have financial repercussions as well.
Many factors contribute to a new family dynamic — such as loss of a loved one, divorce, new family members, and geographical moves. Furthermore, the stress and anxiety that often accompany our traditions can transform what should be the happiest time of year into the most challenging one. As the holidays approach, it is essential to acknowledge their impact on your mental and emotional well-being.
Evaluate what you are feeling and consider why. It is possible that you are one of the 10% of people who experience seasonal affective disorder (SAD) as winter approaches. If you are also navigating significant transitions, normal holiday stress can be magnified. Throughout my family’s transitions, including adding daughters-in-law and grandchildren across different states, I learned to manage expectations and experiment with new traditions while monitoring expenses.
How to Manage Expectations
If you expect your holidays to unfold like a Hallmark movie, you may be setting yourself up for disappointment. Letting go of previous holiday expectations can be challenging, but it is a crucial step. For instance, when I had to accept that I might not see both my sons together on Christmas Day, it was a grieving process that was natural and necessary. It is important to mourn if you need to and to contemplate the new experiences and joys that await you.
While assessing your own expectations, engage your family in conversation about what is important to them. You might discover that you can recreate traditions in ways better suited for your current situation.
Experiment with New Traditions
Reflecting on last Thanksgiving, I realized that even though the day looked perfect from the outside, I felt exhausted and regretful for not fully enjoying it myself. Consequently, when planning for this year’s celebration, we explored different options, such as dining out or hosting smaller gatherings, which ultimately turned out to be fulfilling.
Changes like these can provide you with opportunities for self-care, another way to enhance your holiday experience. Recommendations for self-care during the holidays include:
- Carve out time for yourself. Just 10 minutes of solitude can positively impact your mental health.
- Make (mostly) healthy choices. Enjoy treats occasionally but return to healthier habits right after.
- Say no. Accept only those commitments that are most important to you.
- Make and respect a budget. Consider thoughtful gifts that do not strain your finances.
Monitor Your Expenditures
Maintaining awareness of holiday spending is key to self-care. Surveys suggest that a significant percentage of Americans ended up in holiday debt last year, often against their original intentions. When planning for this festive season, think creatively about how to honor both old and new traditions without overextending yourself financially.
- Be intentional. If your gift list is growing, consider alternatives to traditional exchanges, such as a potluck party where each adult brings food and gifts are limited to children.
- Pass down experiences. Sharing your favorite family activities can be a delightful, cost-free way to create lasting memories.
- Do not be afraid to downsize. Reevaluating the size of family gatherings or even your living space can foster a less stressful environment, especially if it aligns with your financial goals.
Change is hard, and transitions are challenging, but they are not insurmountable. As the holiday season approaches, remember that traditions exist for our enjoyment; we need not mold ourselves to them. Embrace all that the season has to offer, even the unexpected.
Securities offered through LPL Financial, member FINRA/SIPC. Investment advice offered through Merit Financial Group, LLC, an SEC registered investment adviser. Merit Financial Group, LLC and Merit Financial Advisors, are separate entities from LPL Financial. The opinions voiced in this material are for general information only and are not intended to provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual.
Kelly Gallimore is solely an investment advisor representative of Merit Financial Advisors and not affiliated with LPL Financial. Any opinions or views expressed by Kelly Gallimore are his/her own and are not those of LPL Financial.
